Judgement will always backfire on you sooner or later in some form or another. But that’s not the reason to refrain from judgment. Being judgmental is not loving and says more about you than the person you are judging. Not liking something that someone else likes or chooses to do or to believe just means “to each his own” and that isn’t judgement. Judgement is when you take an unloving action against another. It’s when you put someone down, shun them, cause them harm or damage in any form.
One of the things I learned very early in in life that stuck with me was something I first heard in Sunday School: “Do unto others that which you would have done unto you,” If I wouldn’t like it done to me then why on earth would i want to do it to someone else? I think with my heart but I also think with my head. If I would do something hurtful or harmful to someone or even some thing, what could be the reason? Oh, let me count the ways.
I might have some unresolved anger or hurt of my own that I haven’t faced so rather than dealing with it inside of me, I find a way to project it outside of me onto some other person or thing. There I can disown it and beat up on it and (I think) be free of it. The catch is, until I face my own stuff I will never be free of it.
I might have had this modeled to me from birth by those upon whom I am dependent. I might think that this is how you live life stepping upon others or putting them down because I trust the authority figures in my life. I believe what they tell me. I believe because I have not seen any better or because I am afraid of going against their norm. So I never question, I just do what I do, think what I think and believe what I believe. The good news is that at some point, I can open myself to other possibilities and see what really matters to me, calls to me, makes sense to me.
I might have something wired a little wrong in my brain or I might have some damage that does not allow me to be able to use my thought processes in the “normal” sense. I may be under the influence of some drug – illegal or legal – that is interfering with my perception.
Socially speaking, I might get caught up in a mob/herd/group/gang mentality where i have at the moment relinquished my own individual ability to think for myself over to the larger group or leader of the pack. This can be influenced by fear of harm from the group or fear of being banned from the group because I so desperately need to belong, to be wanted. Sometimes I go along with mob/herd/group/gang because I don’t want to be seen as wrong or different.
These things contribute to my being judgmental and often carrying that judgment into action that causes harm or damage to myself or others or both. Have your opinion, chose what you wish to believe in, make your choices but sticking your fist into judgment which often spills into poor judgment on your part and resulting in harmful results is like sticking your hand into that tar baby that does not want to let you go. There goes your freedom. I don’t know about you but I surely do enjoy my freedom.